Month: February 2022

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inspiration

A Terrible Combination

So you spoke your mind…then what?

When you argue with someone is your aim solely to win the argument? Or is it to win over a friend or protect a friendship?

An angry state of mind and an ‘unbridled tongue’ I believe can be one of the most consequential combinations that negatively impact our day to day interactions. Admittedly, an angry disposition PLUS a weapon can be more dangerous, but that’s not the focus of this piece.

Too often we jump at every opportunity to voice our discontent or disdain about something that someone said or did, and we make use of a ‘loose’ tongue to ‘speak our mind’ and exact retribution and judgement against the person.

This is not necessarily to say that we should not voice our discontent. I believe it is best to ‘get stuff off our chest’ instead of harbouring malice and ill will against someone. However, resolving conflict in our interactions with others requires maturity and authenticity, and it helps to approach this with an appropriate combination of action and words. This is indeed the healthiest way to reach a resolution – IF reaching a resolution is in fact the goal.

Whether they be spoken or typed onto a screen, unless we stop and think about the intention or motive of the words we are about to utter, or type, we often end up causing more harm than good.

It sometimes requires us taking a step back, and a few more moments of thought – until the mind is clear – to rectify the situation and create a more harmonious outcome from the conversation. Thus we can end up sparing someone, even ourselves, great embarrassment.

Let us learn to pause before responding. There is great wisdom and value in the occasional delay.

Even if a conversation is charged, a positive outcome can be attained if we are mindful of how we go about it

#ThinkThenSpeak #PositiveConversations #BeCalm

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inspiration

“It’s YOUR Fault; Not MINE!”

If you keep looking for someone to blame, you will find them.

“I’ve messed up yet again; who should I put the blame on this time?”

Well…maybe not in those exact words, but by our very actions we might very well be guilty of blaming others for our mistakes and failures.

We all make bad decisions: some intentional, some unintentional, and others, well, through other people. Yes, sometimes we make decisions that involve other people who we use as surrogates for ourselves, creating the perfect opportunity to disown the outcomes. Decisions that can lead to one logical outcome: our own downfall.

When we selfishly live our life without considering others around us, we are setting ourselves up for isolation and loneliness;

When we fail to consider the feelings of others in our interactions with them, we are creating a hostile environment for ourselves;

When we pursue a philosophy of win/lose, where ‘I must win and you must lose’ thereby putting us in competition with everyone else, we instinctively find ways to keep others down ‘by any means necessary’.

When we selfishly refuse to lend a helping hand to someone else in need, even when we have the ability/capacity to do so, we are limiting the chance of others helping us in our own times of need.

When we seek to blame our past, our parents, or our circumstances while growing up for who we have become and for where we are now, we are denying the free will that we have, as adults, to make our own decisions.

Yes, when we refuse to take responsibility for our own actions and their outcomes, we might well be indirectly shifting the blame to others. Owning our actions and their outcomes allows us to humbly accept the responsibility for their outcomes, and the reward from learning from them.

Because he who refuses to learn from his mistakes is bound to repeat them.

If this were your name tag, would it accurately reflect who you are?

#OwnIt #TakingResponsibility #ItsMyLife #SuccessDependsOnMe #Winning

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inspiration

Routines Are Important (And So Are Disruptions)

DISRUPTIONS: Can’t live with them; can’t live without them

Our days are full of routines. They are necessary for us to operate at peak efficiency while infusing some measure of predictability and a healthy level calmness into our days. Regardless how spontaneous we might be, we do observe routines in most aspects of our lives.

Sometimes our routines get messed up. At times it results from our own action or inaction, while other times it is caused by events outside of our control. Perhaps it’s our bus being late; or a medical emergency; or perhaps something as simple as having to go back for an item we accidentally left at home.

When our routines are derailed we might find ourselves stressed and in a rush trying to ‘catch up’. The result: missing out on opportunities to take a well-needed break; missing out on opportunities for personal growth; or missing out on opportunities to share a laugh with friends. Sometimes it means missing out on opportunities to be a blessing to others.

Let us be alert to opportunities disguised as disruptions to our routines that we encounter each day. Let us anticipate disruptions and plan for them. When these disruptions come, let us seize the moment, and take advantage of the opportunity they present, to have a positive impact on the world we live in.

#HandlingDisruptions #Disruptions #Routines

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inspiration

Grow Where You Are Planted

A farmer never digs up the seed he has planted, to observe its progress. Neither does he keep moving the seed from one place to another before it germinates. If he does that, the seed will never germinate and grow to yield the rich harvest he seeks.

A good farmer knows that quite a lot goes on from this…

Like a seed, real transformation in our lives does not happen in a moment, nor a day, nor even a week. Instead it occurs over time as we patiently allow the strength we are developing within ourselves to ‘germinate’, take root, and grow into something beautiful.

… to this …

The process is chock full of laughter and tears, joy and pain, with numerous twists and turns along the way. But if we are ever to move from our current position at point A to point B(ETTER), we gotta allow the PROCESS to run its course.

You can indeed grow, and thrive, where you are planted if you just be patient with the process.

… to this.

#Growing #WorkingWithTheProcess #PersonalGrowth #Becoming

Categories
inspiration

Opportunities Disguised As Disruptions

Some closed doors can be broken down, but that should not always be the required response.

Hoping to get to work on time one morning after having left home a bit later than usual, I arrived at the train platform just as the doors to the only available train were locked – a full minute ahead of schedule! At least according to my watch. It started moving forward but then it stopped and the doors unlocked, providing me the opportunity to get in. Relieved and breathing a quick ‘Thank God’ under my breath I gleefully entered.

A short distance along our way an alarm went off in my coach and it was confirmed that there was an emergency situation, and with it the potential of a long delay for me getting to work.

My first thought was “Oh man, why did I get this particular train!? I’m gonna be so late!” I immediately reflected on the fact that another train was pulling in when this one was leaving, and how the wait would have been ‘only 5 more minutes’ before that too would have been on its way.

It then occurred to me that perhaps I should say a word of prayer for the person, whatever the emergency happened to be! Admittedly it was a very short prayer that I breathed, and it soon appeared all was well. I started thinking about how often we are presented with opportunities to redirect our focus, but we miss them because we are in a rush to get where we are going.

“…this momentary disruption you are facing might just point you into a different direction than you intended, but which will have a far more positive impact on your life.”

At the same time, we can so easily fail to see how we can turn such disruptions around, making them mere ‘detours along a more scenic route’ where we get the opportunity to experience something special, something we didn’t even know we needed.

Maybe your disruption is just God’s way of telling you to ‘Slow down; take a break; rejuvenate yourself.’ Or perhaps He’s telling you danger is ahead – such as having an accident that takes you to the ER where a routine, precautionary exam reveals some totally unrelated condition that you never knew existed, but which could have life-altering implications.

Who knows, this momentary disruption you are facing might just point you into a different direction than you intended, but which will have a far more positive impact on your life. Or, perhaps, on a journey you had no idea that you needed.

Sometimes a closed road leads to Multiple detours that can yield unexpected yet rewarding results.