Choices are abundant in almost all facets of our lives. We are mostly free to make important choices like careers, jobs, religion, or life partners, and less consequential choices relating to matters such as which outfit to wear when, what colour nail polish or lipstick to buy, what to eat for breakfast/lunch/dinner, etc.
Many of the choices we face daily are universally recognized, and personally demanded and enforced. Some are repetitive and routine, and are applied without much thought.
CHOICES IN OUR ACTIONS AND WORDS: A very important choice we make each day has to do with our actions and our words. Actions have consequences whether positive or negative. Some actions produce immediate rewards or consequences, others produce delayed rewards or consequences. In some cases our actions might provide direct benefit to others, but they are mostly beneficial to ourselves.
However, when it comes to our words, a little goes a long way. As difficult as it might be to do so, it is very important that we choose our words wisely…especially when we are upset.
Being angry tends to suppress any inhibition or concern we might otherwise have had, about the impact of what we say to others. In fact, in our anger, we tend to choose our words strategically, i.e, to have the biggest impact. We aim for their weakest spot, which we sometimes know very well, to attack.
We usually get over whatever made us upset eventually, and perhaps before long it fades from our memory. However, our words and the impact they would have had on the intended target will rest with them for a long time to come, and may well shape their future.
We should always keep in mind that for every situation we encounter we have a choice in how we respond. Yes – that part is entirely up to us. If we demand the right to having a choice about rejecting something that does not favour us, we also should, conversely, accept responsibility for any outcome that emanates from a choice we made.
If, in our interactions with others, we allow someone to aggravate us to the point where we react in an inappropriate or even embarrassing manner, again that is on us. To attempt to sidestep responsibility and say, or even suggest, that someone else ‘made me do it’ is nothing short of an attempt to deflect responsibility. Beyond that though, it suggests an admission that we are not in control of ourselves but instead, are controlled by others.
Choices, after all, have their consequences.